


The Dawn of a New Era

by Safraninflare



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Kink Meme, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-18
Updated: 2020-05-18
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:33:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 599
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24255931
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Safraninflare/pseuds/Safraninflare
Summary: Since the kinkmeme is getting meta I have a fun idea. Nearly all of the Bernadetta prompts are kinky yet still consensual, in a “Bernie deserves nice things; let her get wrecked and love every minute of it!” Way. Which she does. And she should.What if *Bernie* is writing these some prompts? What if she’s writing some of the prompts for others as well?Kink Meme Fill
Comments: 8
Kudos: 19





	The Dawn of a New Era

Bernadetta von Varley had cracked the code. What code, you may ask? 

The code to getting laid. 

She had been in the Abyss library with Yuri about a fortnight and some change prior, looking through the forbidden books that Seteth had banished for being too raunchy. See, Bernadetta von Varley was very much a shut in, but the issue with being a shut in is that you have to provide your own entertainment. 

So, she searched the shelves of bodice-rippers, until she came across a very large, and very strange tome. It had a beautiful, oxblood red leather cover, and the spine was embossed with gold leaf, reading  _ Kink Meme _ in ornate script. What a meme was, she didn’t know, but Bernie certainly knew what a kink was. Therefore, she slipped it into her bag and returned to her room, Seteth none the wiser.

When she returned to her room, she opened the book only to find that all the pages were blank, except for one. Written in a tight script that she had only seen on things that Seteth had penned were the words  _ “Seteth/Manuela. Manuela gives Seteth a handy under the table during a war council meeting. +if Seteth has a dragon dong.” _

Now that Bernadetta thought about it, Seteth and Manuela  _ had _ been acting strangely during the last war council meeting. Now, maybe it was a strange coincidence, but Bernadetta von Varley wasn’t going to back down. In fact, if her hypothesis was correct, well then. She’d end up having a lot of fun. 

So Bernie grabbed her quill, barely thinking before ink touched paper. After all, she was used to penning these scenarios when she wrote her own erotic friend fiction.  _ “Ferdinand/Bernadetta/Hubert, double vaginal penetration,”  _ she wrote. Sure, she hadn’t seen Hubert since the war started, but she still thought about him and his kind of weird vampire aesthetic.  _ “Exactly what it says on the tin: I’d love to see Hubert and Ferdinand working together to fuck Bernadetta simultaneously,” _ she paused, thinking to herself.  _ “ in the same hole. All I ask is that it please be consensual for all three!” _

And then, Bernie waited.

Not even five minutes later did she have a knock on her door, only to find Hubert and Ferdinand von Aegir standing at her doorstep, shirts half open, ready to ravish her like the queen that she was. 

It was a long night, but Bernadetta was not finished. Now that she had confirmed that the tome did work the way that she thought that it did, she had to use it to her full advantage. Anything, anyone that she had ever had a weird sex dream about, it would come to fruition. 

_ But,  _ she thought,  _ isn’t it selfish if I’m the only one having all the fun? _

So Bernadetta wrote. Felix, getting fucked by Dimitri, by Sylvain. Claude von Riegan, wherever he was, getting pegged. The professor in orgies, Hilda and Caspar fucking in the woods… And for good measure, she made sure that Mercedes von Martritz, who was nice to her that one time during the Harpstring moon, got to have the orgasm she so desired.

It was no wonder Seteth kept this basement in Abyss. After all, how else could Bernie and Yuri have a passionate round of kinky dungeon sex? She wasn’t going to just ask him.

No… Bernadetta von Varley was the god of this new world. The world where everyone got boned.

That is… until some bandits stole the book. Well. At least she still had a lot of sex toys left over...

**Author's Note:**

> Okay I need to stop writing crack and actually work on my real pieces.


End file.
